tired of apologizing. why i always ruin my relationship
supposed to be a great day. i mean supposed
i made it a mess. idk whether did i say anything wrongly, the thing that matters is i really ruined today. fml.
supposed not making comparison. but why?
supposed to be smiling all day long. but why end up frowning whole night?
i had no idea what's going wrong.
frankly speaking i'm down to the max. but i do think faking a smile is the best solution now.
i know im not good at that though, but what to do either?
pathetic loser am i.
failing to settle problems like always.
that shows how much she loves you :///
can anyone please just come and give me a fuck? i'm so bloody pissed off with not even a fucking reason. hate falling for someone who supposed not to.
and where the hell are you elaine chen? you're the one who said will be my side listening to my words when im not well? so where the fuck had you been? buddy? you were splitting out some shit when you told this!
im so emotional now ):
could i get someone to comfort me?
You'll regret one little day for how you treated me.
I could easily bear all the torture you gave, all the 'NO', 'DON'T'. But it might end one day too.
I don't need you so much now, not as much as previous day.
Have I change my heart? you should kindly ask yourself.
When i wanted to leave, did you hold me on? i'm just waiting for the moment where it will not come true ever.
Counting down.
I learnt a lesson. Thanks for be my mentor. X)
Er, i've been shortlisted to attend jpa interview. A good try to aim for a scholarship to study abroad. I was listed in the first group to be interviewed, with BRYAN LIEW. at least i felt better and more relax because there's at least a friend beside me that day.
I actually wonder why people unable or unwilling tolerate for a small little stuff? Know how bad the feeling was? The situation is like - you kept tolerating while hoping someone gives a damn on you and realized you were tolerating hardly all these while. But then it always just ended up with something more likely arguments. What's the point here? I don't think tolerating once in a while could be that hard for people. Everyone needs tolerance to survive. I strongly believe that if tolerance doesn't exist, the world is going to be a mess with wars all around ; people are going to fight for a parking slot ; students are going to shout at teachers for nagging them so often. URGHH. I don't know what should i do except tolerating. When the time comes, I apologize ; I swallow down my pride ; I act like bad things never happen ; I smile and laugh ; But what I expected from you is something i couldn't express out with words and pens. I need something that originally spoken out from your heart.
took SPM result two/ three weeks ago. not really remember when was the exact date. it's simply some weeks after that, i'd applied for some scholarships, but i didn't expect much from them as i know well i might get myself into college life with parental sponsorship. well. my result was considered so-so. neither excellent nor bad. my mum asked me to be satisfy with the results as she's overjoy when she knew about my result. HAHAHA. this actually brought a lot of satisfaction to me indeed. i've never feel regret cause i did put so much effort on it. the only thing which turned me down was the MALAY result. i thought i could score A+, but end up with A only. it's alright. my mum comforted me,"son, you thought it's easy to score 8A+? i cant even score if i'm given a second chance." HAHAHA. " i laughed silently. To be frank, i expected to get 9A+.
Paid a visit to UTP few days ago. Impressive environment. 5 class-library! the best library i'd ever seen.
relation problem really screwed me up. Wasn't in good mood lately. barely hold tears from flowing out. HAHAHA. (: i'm so alright with this too. i might need some time to get rid of it and, start a new life perhaps?
